Yesterday, I woke up with a really bad headache. I couldn't remember some parts of the night before, but I had this really hollow feeling of regret in the pit of my stomach. I tried calling Allan, who was to be ninong at Thor's baptismal, but he was fast asleep. I texted him a sorry and took a nap. I had nightmares.
I woke up at 10:30 for Thor's 11 pm baptismal and I called Ralph up. He gave me directions; 30 minutes later, I was rushing in a taxi to get to Proj. 7. Thankfully, the pre-baptismal seminar was still in full swing (with a really mataray catechist), so I could still proxy for Allan.
Thor was great. He didn't even cry when they poured water on his head, though he fussed when the godparents grabbed his limbs. He's a very good-looking baby with his shaped eyebrows and deep, black eyes.
Ayn couldn't make it because she was studying for an exam the next day. Roel was at ASAP with Parokya. And Ninong Allan was still asleep at home, exhausted from work and a histrionic girlfriend from the night before. Therefore, I was alone in the midst of Ralph and Charmaine friends.
But I had fun. The food was excellent with fresh fruits and seafood from Mindanao. I declined trying the durian popsicles though because they were actually covered in chocolate. Yuck. ANd I met nice people, too. Thor was so cute.
Allan finally woke up at 1:30, and I was so relieved he wasn't mad at me for the night before. I told him I was sorry and that I'd explain everything in full once we saw each other. I then passed the phone to Ralph.
I went to Allan's house and we talked for a while before going to Robinson's Ermita for another Parokya thing. We were supposed to go back to Ralph's after, but were so exhausted that we went home and fell asleep.
Congratulations, Thor, Charmaine and Ralph!
Monday, January 31, 2005
sabog night
Since we've all been so revealing lately, let me recount my Saturday stupidity.
First of all, Allan was in Cavite for a Moonstar thing, so I was left to take charge. Also, several bands had to back out at the last minute due to unavoidable circumstances (a root canal recovery, scary symptoms like coughing up blood in your phlegm, etc.). There were a lot of new bands line up, too. So I was pretty nervous when I got to Mayric's.
I arrived there at 9:30 pm and... there was no one inside. I wasn't expecting an audience, but I was at least expecting some band members, and there was no one. I felt very frustrated (and emotional because a certain time of the month was coming up). By the time Jann Paul arrived (and he wasn't even supposed to because Allan told him to come at 12), I had decided to drink.
Yep. Those who have followed this blog since the very beginning know the very dire consequences of a decision like that.
Suffice it to say, I made a fool of myself on and off stage. Histrionics. Hopefully, others won't be so harsh.
Okay, this is what little I remember of the night. Band people only started coming in at 10:30, but it wasn't until 11 that there were enough completed bands to start the show (hence, my craziness that night). I asked Jann Paul and Erick if they'd agree to a Popdays acoustic set (wala si Ian so di sila pwede), pumayag naman sila. Grasspipe started off the night. Ekong was right, they're a more mellow version of Sunset Drive, but with a little more variety of other elements in them. I remember noting this in my phone while I was buzzed: "if dandy were emo, theyd be grasspipe." Next played... um... Beyond Broken Stars? Yeah. They sounded more regular to me. Next came... um... Poo Poo Vox. Now, I may have been squashed by then, but they sound like they've improved. I typed this in my phone: " if dandy were dandy, theyd be poopoo vox." Well, they sounded something like that, but in retrospect, I reconsider. Dandy has lower, more subdued vocals... but it was "kind of the effect" that Poopoo Vox was making on me.
Tether was next. I think I was out of it already. They played really well, though, despite the newness of their drummer. They were great! And I was splattered. Lara arrived with her dad and sister, and she was sort of delighted about my state. She asked me to greet her dad while onstage. Ack. We met someone in the CR whose name was Zheyd. I think.
Pillow played next. It was a disaster. Although I remembered most of the words, I was slightly off-key in some parts; Allan was too; JP's beats were slower; and Charles was... um, I forgot what Allan said about it, but basically, everyone was off in one way or another. But I was still the worst. I was moving weirdly, I almost fell in some parts of "Bathing in the Sun". Sorry, bandmates. Sorry, people. Will never do that again.
After us, Tuesday Sorrow played, but I was reeling.
My last real memory was talking to Manuel and Mavi about something. I think I rambled on and on. I broke my favorite sandals. And Allan took me home while I tried to explain in tears why I went weird that night. Afterward, he went to Mister Kebab to meet everyone else.
And that was it.
First of all, Allan was in Cavite for a Moonstar thing, so I was left to take charge. Also, several bands had to back out at the last minute due to unavoidable circumstances (a root canal recovery, scary symptoms like coughing up blood in your phlegm, etc.). There were a lot of new bands line up, too. So I was pretty nervous when I got to Mayric's.
I arrived there at 9:30 pm and... there was no one inside. I wasn't expecting an audience, but I was at least expecting some band members, and there was no one. I felt very frustrated (and emotional because a certain time of the month was coming up). By the time Jann Paul arrived (and he wasn't even supposed to because Allan told him to come at 12), I had decided to drink.
Yep. Those who have followed this blog since the very beginning know the very dire consequences of a decision like that.
Suffice it to say, I made a fool of myself on and off stage. Histrionics. Hopefully, others won't be so harsh.
Okay, this is what little I remember of the night. Band people only started coming in at 10:30, but it wasn't until 11 that there were enough completed bands to start the show (hence, my craziness that night). I asked Jann Paul and Erick if they'd agree to a Popdays acoustic set (wala si Ian so di sila pwede), pumayag naman sila. Grasspipe started off the night. Ekong was right, they're a more mellow version of Sunset Drive, but with a little more variety of other elements in them. I remember noting this in my phone while I was buzzed: "if dandy were emo, theyd be grasspipe." Next played... um... Beyond Broken Stars? Yeah. They sounded more regular to me. Next came... um... Poo Poo Vox. Now, I may have been squashed by then, but they sound like they've improved. I typed this in my phone: " if dandy were dandy, theyd be poopoo vox." Well, they sounded something like that, but in retrospect, I reconsider. Dandy has lower, more subdued vocals... but it was "kind of the effect" that Poopoo Vox was making on me.
Tether was next. I think I was out of it already. They played really well, though, despite the newness of their drummer. They were great! And I was splattered. Lara arrived with her dad and sister, and she was sort of delighted about my state. She asked me to greet her dad while onstage. Ack. We met someone in the CR whose name was Zheyd. I think.
Pillow played next. It was a disaster. Although I remembered most of the words, I was slightly off-key in some parts; Allan was too; JP's beats were slower; and Charles was... um, I forgot what Allan said about it, but basically, everyone was off in one way or another. But I was still the worst. I was moving weirdly, I almost fell in some parts of "Bathing in the Sun". Sorry, bandmates. Sorry, people. Will never do that again.
After us, Tuesday Sorrow played, but I was reeling.
My last real memory was talking to Manuel and Mavi about something. I think I rambled on and on. I broke my favorite sandals. And Allan took me home while I tried to explain in tears why I went weird that night. Afterward, he went to Mister Kebab to meet everyone else.
And that was it.
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Buzz Night is this Saturday, the 29th of January
Buzz Night on Saturday January29, 2005 at Mayric's 10 pm!
Soft Pillow Kisses
My Science Project
Beyond Broken Stars
Poo Poo Vox
Tuesday Sorrow
Grasspipe
Tether
Popular Days
Entrance is P100.
+++
Belated Happy Birthday to Charles Manjares.
Soft Pillow Kisses
My Science Project
Beyond Broken Stars
Poo Poo Vox
Tuesday Sorrow
Grasspipe
Tether
Popular Days
Entrance is P100.
+++
Belated Happy Birthday to Charles Manjares.
Friday, January 21, 2005
wowowee
ralph: yehey. binyag na! day after buzz night pa hehe... ngarag kami niyan. excited akong makita si thor uli. saan yung reception niyo, sa bago niyong crib?
ayn: hindi makakatugtog ang kendi kasi feb 17 ang date ng backbeat sa up fair. thursday yun. not unless makapractice tayo before then kasi ang plano lumang kanta yung itutugtog. mahirap lang kasi mag-sked. on the other hand, hindi rin sure yung pillow kasi may bago silang vocalist at hindi pa niya alam yung mga kanta masyado.
ekong: ok to go na yung grasspipe for buzz night. sana makapunta talaga sila. salamat sa rekomendasyon.
to everyone: buzz night is on the 29th of january at mayric's. bagetsafonik and grasspipe will be playing, but i'll just post the final lineup next week.
ayn: hindi makakatugtog ang kendi kasi feb 17 ang date ng backbeat sa up fair. thursday yun. not unless makapractice tayo before then kasi ang plano lumang kanta yung itutugtog. mahirap lang kasi mag-sked. on the other hand, hindi rin sure yung pillow kasi may bago silang vocalist at hindi pa niya alam yung mga kanta masyado.
ekong: ok to go na yung grasspipe for buzz night. sana makapunta talaga sila. salamat sa rekomendasyon.
to everyone: buzz night is on the 29th of january at mayric's. bagetsafonik and grasspipe will be playing, but i'll just post the final lineup next week.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
Monday, January 17, 2005
weird range
i was looking at the counter information, especially the "searched words" people typed to get to this blog and mine, and i was surprised at how wide the range of subjects tackled by (or at least associated) this blog were. weirder examples:
"manyak stuff"
"mompo mass wine"
"sooperbabes"
"shake body body dancer"
"carmi martin pics"
"chowkings cost control system"
"totoo bang may taong ahas sa Robinsons Galleria"
"chlorine injection"
"Luie appears to be offline"
"quote sheets of shoppersville katipunan"
"drying of kamias"
"deviled hotdogs"
"story end sanay wala nang wakas"
"what happen to selena brother sister" <---- this freaks me out!
"christmas song lyrics to dun dundun dun"
"candy audioline allan" (naks)
"ralphyboy" (naks)
"prostitute in Dubai"
"nymphetz"
"la lopez eh kasi bata"
"wasn't wearing a bra blog"
"March celebrations in olongapo"
"The cellular phone phenomenon"
"Karen Manyak"
"cuardo in spanish to english"
"Cornflake poinsettias"
"what does eezle mean"
wala lang. kakaiba.
"manyak stuff"
"mompo mass wine"
"sooperbabes"
"shake body body dancer"
"carmi martin pics"
"chowkings cost control system"
"totoo bang may taong ahas sa Robinsons Galleria"
"chlorine injection"
"Luie appears to be offline"
"quote sheets of shoppersville katipunan"
"drying of kamias"
"deviled hotdogs"
"story end sanay wala nang wakas"
"what happen to selena brother sister" <---- this freaks me out!
"christmas song lyrics to dun dundun dun"
"candy audioline allan" (naks)
"ralphyboy" (naks)
"prostitute in Dubai"
"nymphetz"
"la lopez eh kasi bata"
"wasn't wearing a bra blog"
"March celebrations in olongapo"
"The cellular phone phenomenon"
"Karen Manyak"
"cuardo in spanish to english"
"Cornflake poinsettias"
"what does eezle mean"
wala lang. kakaiba.
welcome to THE BUZZ nite.... bow
1. I got a new job! It pays better. Maybe we can record again hehe.
alas! the perennial "record again". :D
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
mastahplann? di ba dapat s _ _ _ _ _ _ _ a ? hehehe.
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
waggggg... di ko pa kayo napapanood ng matagal!
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
yes, and it's almost waist-deep. can you imagine me wearing (generic) neatly-pressed, tucked-in long sleeves polo, black pants and black leather shoes? multiply that 5 times a week. i thought so. :D
actually, i'll only enjoy the fruits of my makeover come june and december this year... which still is a good 5 and 11 months away, respectively. hehehe.
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
parang si nepomuceno... si willie nepomuceno.
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
si roel ang nagbuntis? :p
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
shop
8. Binata na si Charles.
astig!
alas! the perennial "record again". :D
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
mastahplann? di ba dapat s _ _ _ _ _ _ _ a ? hehehe.
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
waggggg... di ko pa kayo napapanood ng matagal!
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
yes, and it's almost waist-deep. can you imagine me wearing (generic) neatly-pressed, tucked-in long sleeves polo, black pants and black leather shoes? multiply that 5 times a week. i thought so. :D
actually, i'll only enjoy the fruits of my makeover come june and december this year... which still is a good 5 and 11 months away, respectively. hehehe.
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
parang si nepomuceno... si willie nepomuceno.
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
si roel ang nagbuntis? :p
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
shop
8. Binata na si Charles.
astig!
Sunday, January 16, 2005
sagot tsismiss tzizmizz
1. I got a new job! It pays better. Maybe we can record again hehe.
dun dun dun doodoodundun...
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
huh... aaaah, ANO! Bahala bahala...
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
1st sad story for the year. one member got sacked. they are not going to disband... goodluck guys...
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
abah... tumatakas sa obligasyon ha... hoy yung ambag mo sa studio! huwag ka muna bumili ng kotse, van lang...
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
dabdab!!! d ako seryoso nung gabing yun... d rin ako comfortable sa mga kasama natin... for everyone's information, i'm somewhere between a decent bowler and an average one... baketball talaga ang forte' ko...
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
awawah naman... ang gwapo cguro nun pag laki...
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
happy together?
8. Binata na si Charles.
pero MANYAKIS pa rin!!! MANYAK! MANYAK! MNYAK!!!
dun dun dun doodoodundun...
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
huh... aaaah, ANO! Bahala bahala...
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
1st sad story for the year. one member got sacked. they are not going to disband... goodluck guys...
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
abah... tumatakas sa obligasyon ha... hoy yung ambag mo sa studio! huwag ka muna bumili ng kotse, van lang...
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
dabdab!!! d ako seryoso nung gabing yun... d rin ako comfortable sa mga kasama natin... for everyone's information, i'm somewhere between a decent bowler and an average one... baketball talaga ang forte' ko...
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
awawah naman... ang gwapo cguro nun pag laki...
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
happy together?
8. Binata na si Charles.
pero MANYAKIS pa rin!!! MANYAK! MANYAK! MNYAK!!!
Friday, January 14, 2005
various chismis
1. I got a new job! It pays better. Maybe we can record again hehe.
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
8. Binata na si Charles.
2. Actually, may master plan na si Allan para sa LP so don't worry.
3. May internal problems daw ang Tether???!!! Hoy, wag naman kayo mag-disband! Sayang na sayang naman...
4. Ralph is knee-deep in corporate culture but is being well-remunerated for it. (oops) :)
5. Allan is an erratic bowler: he can be lousy but can make strikes at random.
6. Ipinaglihi ni Roel and baby niya kay Allan.
7. Ayn is back in the mire of law school but is trying to drag herself out of it enough so that she and i can _________ together.
8. Binata na si Charles.
Monday, January 10, 2005
Pasensya na
I thought it was high time I change the blog's template as the problem has become even bigger. I chose pink because it's sort of candy-ish...
Anyway, I'm sure we'll find ways to make this look as good as the last one. For now, the barest features (tagboard, counter, links, band member photos) will have to suffice.
Enjoy!
Anyway, I'm sure we'll find ways to make this look as good as the last one. For now, the barest features (tagboard, counter, links, band member photos) will have to suffice.
Enjoy!
Comments on the previous
First of all, Buzz Night is on the 29th na talaga. Hindi lang kami nagkakarinigan nung isang gabi.
Putcha! The Palanca award for "Noehbahdee cahrress..."!!! That's rich!
That's an interesting post, Ayn. It really presented some valid and often ignored points about politics and music. Medyo skeptical nga lang ako sa sinabi ng author sa dulo about "making our own games" kasi parang naging sobrang vague na siya dun (pero understandable din kasi hindi rin tama kung nag-dictate naman siya). Kaya lang kasi, the system is so big that it encompasses almost every "humane" act in the world, and ultimately, every thing you do will be part of it (the dilemma is then the definition of "humane" and whether it's real or something the system made up)... unless you do something "universally" reviled like murder someone (or in the case of music, probably, kill someone or defecate onstage)... but even that is relative. In the end, it all really depends on what your morals are and kung ano na lang ang masisikmura mong gawin.
For Candyaudioline, tingin ko, hindi masyadong political stance ang nag-enable satin na mag-survive despite backlash from critics on success/output issues. I think it's more of the fact that we're tired of dealing with people who expect us to behave in certain ways and throw hissy fits when we can't exactly do so... so parang "HAY NAKOH" na lang tapos sundin na lang natin yung mga sarili nating goals (which, so far, don't go beyond getting that darn EP/LP out). And I think we've also become "shet-bahala-na-nga" because within our own group exist dissenting ideas and we've had to learn to work with each other in spite of these. We've just had to find SOME sort of neutral ground, and it just so happens that this common ground makes other people frown or smile randomly. Yun pa lang ang nasisikmura natin for now.
Hmmm... ano kaya yung iniisip niyang paraan ng pag- work "out of the system"? And is everything really futile? A lot of the time, it seems that way to me :( So, in my view, what we do now may seem insignificant, apathetic and meaningless to some people, but it's what gets me through the week, honestly.
*I tried fixing the sidebar but couldn't tell what was wrong. I don't think Ayn's post had any characters that could have caused it. Di bale na lang. it will come back up eventually when the post leaves the page hehehe... unless Ralph can fix it first.
Putcha! The Palanca award for "Noehbahdee cahrress..."!!! That's rich!
That's an interesting post, Ayn. It really presented some valid and often ignored points about politics and music. Medyo skeptical nga lang ako sa sinabi ng author sa dulo about "making our own games" kasi parang naging sobrang vague na siya dun (pero understandable din kasi hindi rin tama kung nag-dictate naman siya). Kaya lang kasi, the system is so big that it encompasses almost every "humane" act in the world, and ultimately, every thing you do will be part of it (the dilemma is then the definition of "humane" and whether it's real or something the system made up)... unless you do something "universally" reviled like murder someone (or in the case of music, probably, kill someone or defecate onstage)... but even that is relative. In the end, it all really depends on what your morals are and kung ano na lang ang masisikmura mong gawin.
For Candyaudioline, tingin ko, hindi masyadong political stance ang nag-enable satin na mag-survive despite backlash from critics on success/output issues. I think it's more of the fact that we're tired of dealing with people who expect us to behave in certain ways and throw hissy fits when we can't exactly do so... so parang "HAY NAKOH" na lang tapos sundin na lang natin yung mga sarili nating goals (which, so far, don't go beyond getting that darn EP/LP out). And I think we've also become "shet-bahala-na-nga" because within our own group exist dissenting ideas and we've had to learn to work with each other in spite of these. We've just had to find SOME sort of neutral ground, and it just so happens that this common ground makes other people frown or smile randomly. Yun pa lang ang nasisikmura natin for now.
Hmmm... ano kaya yung iniisip niyang paraan ng pag- work "out of the system"? And is everything really futile? A lot of the time, it seems that way to me :( So, in my view, what we do now may seem insignificant, apathetic and meaningless to some people, but it's what gets me through the week, honestly.
*I tried fixing the sidebar but couldn't tell what was wrong. I don't think Ayn's post had any characters that could have caused it. Di bale na lang. it will come back up eventually when the post leaves the page hehehe... unless Ralph can fix it first.
local underground movement...
natatandaan ko pa kuya...
mid 80's - punk / ska and hardcore bands dominated the scene while a small minority of new wave / neo-romatic-goth inspired act were making their presence felt...
late 80's to 1990 - the neo-romatics and the new wave inspired people were the dominant part of the local underground. punk and hardcore was being confused with speed metal and trash...
early 90's - while new wave inspired bands one by one caught the attention of the local gigsters here in manila while being converted to grunge and other widely accepted form of mainstream college radio fodder, high velocity metal of all forms became the flavor of the underground... but in cebu, new wave was the flavor of that period...
mid 90's - punk was resurrected but still, metal held it's ground inspite of grunge's popularity world wide, i never remember it becoming big in the local underground movement. also, by the end of this period goth established itself as "the other" underground movement with a truly "hardcore" following... another scene was also making it's presence felt but on a very "restricted level". this was the local shoegaze scene...
late 90's - alternative became a joke... the underground was still the haven for local metal (specially death metal), punk / ska, goth, the newly christened "indie" movement (shoegaze, indiepop and indierock) scene and even hip-hop. but during this period, new rap metal bands made their mark in the underground and on to the mainstream...
2000 until present - not much has changed, still the same cast of genres either trying their best to avoid wide mass acceptance or simply couldn't get any wider mass acceptance... it was during this period that "indie" went the way alternative did (it also became a joke)inspite of some local indiepop bands getting notice, respect and rave reviews from the foreign indie community. new metal became bigger and ska / new punk got a wider audience...
the future... i can see ABS/CBN Chanel 2 GOING UNDERGROUND!!! oi! oi! Oi! sarah geronimo and martin neivera releasing split 7" eps, mark bautista releasing a covers 12" with songs by still little fingers, the accused, napalm death and ice T. both will top all undreground top 10 charts in every barangay in the country... rico blanco wins a best actor award for his indie film "maging sino ka man the next generation" and a palanca awards for the lines "...nobody cares" which by that time, will be the undergound battle-cry for many years to come... yuck! yuck and YUCK!
mid 80's - punk / ska and hardcore bands dominated the scene while a small minority of new wave / neo-romatic-goth inspired act were making their presence felt...
late 80's to 1990 - the neo-romatics and the new wave inspired people were the dominant part of the local underground. punk and hardcore was being confused with speed metal and trash...
early 90's - while new wave inspired bands one by one caught the attention of the local gigsters here in manila while being converted to grunge and other widely accepted form of mainstream college radio fodder, high velocity metal of all forms became the flavor of the underground... but in cebu, new wave was the flavor of that period...
mid 90's - punk was resurrected but still, metal held it's ground inspite of grunge's popularity world wide, i never remember it becoming big in the local underground movement. also, by the end of this period goth established itself as "the other" underground movement with a truly "hardcore" following... another scene was also making it's presence felt but on a very "restricted level". this was the local shoegaze scene...
late 90's - alternative became a joke... the underground was still the haven for local metal (specially death metal), punk / ska, goth, the newly christened "indie" movement (shoegaze, indiepop and indierock) scene and even hip-hop. but during this period, new rap metal bands made their mark in the underground and on to the mainstream...
2000 until present - not much has changed, still the same cast of genres either trying their best to avoid wide mass acceptance or simply couldn't get any wider mass acceptance... it was during this period that "indie" went the way alternative did (it also became a joke)inspite of some local indiepop bands getting notice, respect and rave reviews from the foreign indie community. new metal became bigger and ska / new punk got a wider audience...
the future... i can see ABS/CBN Chanel 2 GOING UNDERGROUND!!! oi! oi! Oi! sarah geronimo and martin neivera releasing split 7" eps, mark bautista releasing a covers 12" with songs by still little fingers, the accused, napalm death and ice T. both will top all undreground top 10 charts in every barangay in the country... rico blanco wins a best actor award for his indie film "maging sino ka man the next generation" and a palanca awards for the lines "...nobody cares" which by that time, will be the undergound battle-cry for many years to come... yuck! yuck and YUCK!
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Working "Within the System"
“If you beat them at their own game, you’ve lost.”
So… you’re in a band, with a really important message, and you want to get it out to as many people as possible—so you’re trying to get really popular and sell lots and lots of records. Or perhaps, you’re a political activist and you think it’s necessary to use the mainstream media to educate people about certain issues. It seems to make sense that you should use these methods to reach people—because otherwise, who will notice you? Yes, you realize that you’re making compromises with the very system you’re trying to fight, but it’ll be worth it in the end… and we all have to make compromises, don’t we?
It’s worth considering whether we do after all, just as it’s worth questioning whether getting ahead in their system of cutthroat competition and mass-marketing can ever really help us change the world. What would happen if we stopped compromising, stopped playing their game altogether and concentrated all our efforts on creating channels of our own for spreading ideas in new ways?
The Revolution cannot be televised…
* According to Selena, Buzznite is on the 28th (tentative).
* yung sidebar at tagboard nausog sa baba. Don't know why.
So… you’re in a band, with a really important message, and you want to get it out to as many people as possible—so you’re trying to get really popular and sell lots and lots of records. Or perhaps, you’re a political activist and you think it’s necessary to use the mainstream media to educate people about certain issues. It seems to make sense that you should use these methods to reach people—because otherwise, who will notice you? Yes, you realize that you’re making compromises with the very system you’re trying to fight, but it’ll be worth it in the end… and we all have to make compromises, don’t we?
It’s worth considering whether we do after all, just as it’s worth questioning whether getting ahead in their system of cutthroat competition and mass-marketing can ever really help us change the world. What would happen if we stopped compromising, stopped playing their game altogether and concentrated all our efforts on creating channels of our own for spreading ideas in new ways?
The Revolution cannot be televised…
Of course, they want you on their television show, radio program, rock festival, major label. They don’t care whether they’re selling mouthwash or anarchist revolution as long as they can keep people watching and buying. They know that sooner or later people are bound to get bored and fed up with the mindless, passionless drivel that they normally have to offer, and they count on you to keep new ideas and styles coming for them to exploit; without that, they’d have nothing new to sell people. They know if they can find ways to sell your own expressions of outrage back to you, to cash in on their frustration that their own system creates, they’ve got you beat. They know that no message you could spread through their channels could be more powerful than the message that your use of their medium itself sends: stay tuned.
No awareness you could possibly raise with television appearances or CDs sold in shopping malls is more important than the awareness of the power of individuals to act for themselves. Television watching and supermarket shopping keep people passive, watching things that they can never take part in and people they can never meet, buying what is marketed to them by corporations rather than making their own music, their own ideas, their own lives. To motivate people to act for themselves, you have to contact them more directly.
The Values of Mass Production…
We’re taught to think of our success in terms of numbers, aren’t we? If touching one person’s life is a good thing, then touching one thousand people’s lives must be a great thing. It’s easy to see where we learned to think this way: our whole society revolves around mass production. The more units we can move, the more customers we can serve, the more votes we can get, the more money and stuff we have, the better, right?
But maybe it’s not possible to touch a thousand people as deeply or as powerfully as one person or ten people. And maybe it’s not really so revolutionary after all to have one person or group telling everybody else what’s right. Wouldn’t it be better to try a decentralized approach where everyone works closely with those around them, instead of a few people leading an anonymous mass? Do you, or your band, or your label have to save the world all by yourselves? Why don’t you trust anyone else to do it with you? (And have you noticed how much you have to stomp all over everyone else to get that success you plan to use to spread your message?)
One political band playing a show to nine hundred people can recite revolutionary slogans for everyone present to stand and listen to, but they remain out of arm’s reach of most of the people there, up on a pedestal as “musicians,” “artists,” “heroes.” On the other hand, one band playing an equally impassioned show to forty people, in a more intimate setting, can interact on a personal level with everyone there, and make it clear that everyone is capable of doing what they do. Thus they have the potential to spark four more bands (or similar revolutionary projects), increasing their own impact exponentially. The same goes for record labels, for writers, for speakers and artists, and of course for organizers and “leaders” of any kind.
Working within the System…
Most of us don’t get much pleasure out of things we have to do to work inside the system. We’d rather be reading books on our own than writing assigned papers for school, rather be using our skills, energy, and time to work on projects of our own choice than selling ourselves to employers. But we feel like we have to work for them, whether we like it or not. It never occurs to us how much more fun, and perhaps more effective, it could be to take our labor out of their hands and do something else with it. Sure it would be hard at first, but what could be harder than to have to put up with this bullshit for the rest of our lives? Better we dedicate ourselves to replacing it than just dealing with it.
But, you protest, you’re still going to be fighting the status quo, you’re going to change things from the inside, right? That’s what THEY tell you, at least. Of course the system has “appropriate procedures” for people with grievances to go through to try to make things better, that’s the safety valve to release pressure when people get TOO worked up. Do you think the powers that be would really let anyone use their own laws and methods to depose them? If this system provided opportunities for real change, people would have taken advantage of them a long time ago. Countless generations have set out convinced that they would succeed where others had failed—that’s where lawyers and reporters COME FROM, you know. They’re the cynical corpses of idealistic young men and women who thought the system could be reformed.
Besides, can you trust yourself to work “within the system” for the right reasons? We’re all programmed to want “success,” to measure ourselves by wealth and social status, whether we like it or not. Could it be that you want to become a journalist or professor of political science or rock star because you can’t bring yourself to consider any other options seriously, because you’re afraid to try cutting to the safety line that ties you to the security of a mainstream lifestyle? And how can you be sure it isn’t that dark corner of your heart pushing you to seek success, the part that loves the attention and feelings of greatness your popularity and social standing bring? Sure it feels great to be able to tell your parents what your goals are and have them applaud your decisions… but is that any way to decide how to go about changing the world?
Let’s listen to our hearts, trust our instincts, and refuse to participate in anything that bores or outrages us. We need to nourish our idealism and our willingness to take risks, not work out new ways to integrate our frustration and our desperation for change back into the society that engendered them. Remember, every day we spend “using the system” is another day longer we’ll have to wait until new networks and better ways of life replace the old ones.
How do we get out of here?
Yes, it often seems like there’s no alternative to working “within the system” for we want to get things done and not keep our ideas quarantined within the narrow confines of the underground. But why keep the underground quarantined to narrow confines? Surely if we put all our energy into expanding the spaces in which we can interact as free, equal human beings, rather than trying to repair the burning machinery of this doomed society, we could make at least as much of an impact. Imagine what we could achieve if we kept all our potential in our own hands, and refused to waste it ever again working for their system for even a minute.
There’s no excuse to let a fraction of our lives go by doing things we don’t love, or to let any of our talents and efforts serve to prop up a world order we oppose. Instead, let’s fight so hard, and live so hard, that others inside the cages of mainstream life can see us and are inspired to join us in our complete rejection of the old world and all it’s bullshit. And let’s make our communities something greater than they are; let’s make them more open and more capable of offering life-support, so that others really will be able to join us.
The system we live under offers only losers’ games—so why apply them? It’s up to us to create new games, more joyous and exciting than the old ones. Let’s not try to beat them at their games, but make them join us in ours.
~[CrimethInc.]
* The author may sound argumentative, persuasive, and biased—but I do find some bits of this entry (even if we aren’t’ really a bunch of hardcore radicals) as somewhat reflective of the very same principles (if any) that underlie, consciously or subconsciously, within the concept of Buzznite and Candyaudioline (sans the generic concept of “revolution”), and why we still exist despite all the detractors (mainstream or otherwise) that come in our way. Any objections or violent reactions—kindly refer to the disclaimer to be found at the top of this blog.
* According to Selena, Buzznite is on the 28th (tentative).
* yung sidebar at tagboard nausog sa baba. Don't know why.
Buzz Night this January...
... is on the 28th, Allan told me last night. But that's on a Friday. I'll have to confirm with him whether that's true--- it's supposed to be on a Saturday. Tuloy na tuloy ang Buzz Night this month in either case.
Thursday, January 06, 2005
late entry...
last monday (jan 3) i recieved the 4 dvd's i purchased from amazon.com. these were live concert dvd from shed seven, another live dvd from the inspiral carpets, pulp (the UK band, not the stupid lokal music zine) video singles and the verve's singles video compilation... among the 4 dvd's, the inspiral carpets' really got my attention. not that the others were crap, in fact panalo lahat lalu na yung shed seven at pulp. the inspiral carpets dvd was actually taken from one date off their reunion tour sometime 2003... first thing i noticed was that they've all aged a lot especially the singer tom hingley. it was like watching the new order dvd but the carpets did things with the right amount of tightness, grace and intensity... the stage backdrop was truly stunning with two widescreens constantly displaying the lengendary "cool as fuck" slogan/logo that the inspirals made famous and the cowhead "moo" logo that they use for their shirt. there were also some aninations showed during songs one such was during the song "this it how it feels" wherein the main character looks like me... the songs are still as fresh as ever. the crowd really had a great time and it was trully a jampacked venue filled with surprisingly a larger young audience singing along to almost all of the songs. those brits really know their music. i think that's the reason why there are so many great bands out there -- because the crowd's great... yun lang...
by the way, the inspiral carpets was one of the bands that lead the early nineties manchester acid house movement (later was to be popularly know at the britpop movement) along with the likes of the stone roses, happy mondays and the charlatans. the were formed in 1985 and disbanded sometine in 1995... they were one of John Peel's favourite bands along with the fall and the wedding present... present guitarist for the charlatans, "Mark Collins" once roadied for the carpets. noel gallager of oasis was the carpets, van driver...
by the way, the inspiral carpets was one of the bands that lead the early nineties manchester acid house movement (later was to be popularly know at the britpop movement) along with the likes of the stone roses, happy mondays and the charlatans. the were formed in 1985 and disbanded sometine in 1995... they were one of John Peel's favourite bands along with the fall and the wedding present... present guitarist for the charlatans, "Mark Collins" once roadied for the carpets. noel gallager of oasis was the carpets, van driver...
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
somewhere down the road...
somewhere down the road
our roads are gonna cross again
- barry manilow
i've lost count as to how many times we've been on this very same crossroad. and at the same time i've lost count as to, no matter the circumstance(s), how many times we've all met again at the end of it.
the perennial question of band or bust has long plagued us; yet in the end we still settled our differences, lowered our pride, and always came back to candy. ika nga ni peter parker/spiderman, "it's both a gift and a curse". gift, kasi nalalaman natin yung mga hinanakit natin and we iron out whatever differences we have. curse, because apparently things like these which could be settled privately come out in the open... becoming conversation fodder for our blog's readers.
now we're here again, and it will be pretty interesting to know where this road will lead us. dalawa na kami ni selena dito sa fence.
manigong bagong taon sa lahat!
p.s.
the corporate world sucks ass and balls.
our roads are gonna cross again
- barry manilow
i've lost count as to how many times we've been on this very same crossroad. and at the same time i've lost count as to, no matter the circumstance(s), how many times we've all met again at the end of it.
the perennial question of band or bust has long plagued us; yet in the end we still settled our differences, lowered our pride, and always came back to candy. ika nga ni peter parker/spiderman, "it's both a gift and a curse". gift, kasi nalalaman natin yung mga hinanakit natin and we iron out whatever differences we have. curse, because apparently things like these which could be settled privately come out in the open... becoming conversation fodder for our blog's readers.
now we're here again, and it will be pretty interesting to know where this road will lead us. dalawa na kami ni selena dito sa fence.
manigong bagong taon sa lahat!
p.s.
the corporate world sucks ass and balls.
what da facts...
------Allan dear, there's a big difference between "not wanting to become a part" and "getting kicked out."
"not wanting to become a part" - this is a result of your texting selana bout what you felt about what i said to you that night without even asking me if i did meant what i said that night. in all honesty, wala sa akin yun. if i really meant that, hindi na kita pinagbigyan sa request mong kumain pa tayo sa timog... i learned nalang about it nung ikinuwento sa akin ni selena at nang tanungin nya ako kung pinag-quit kita... nagulat nga pala ako. sabi ko pa nga sa kanya "ah kaya pala nya kinukuha yung bass at yung guitar nya..." if you know me, d ganun ang style ko... there are only 2 ways that i do if i'm going to kick someone out of the band. one is d ko papaalam sa kanya na tanggal na sya and the other is i'll say it to him/her directly... kung yung ginawa/pagaalaska mo nung gabing yun ang dahilan para alisin kita sa banda eh ang babaw ko naman at lalabas naman akong napaka-insecure...
the only one who kicked someone out of the band is you so don't point a finger at me... a suggestion is different from a desicion both in spelling and in meaning meaning...
------You admitted it yourself when you didn't protest that time when I texted you that "it wasn't my decision." And then I read this on the blog: “..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”--which, you said so yourself, was directed at me. Now, you claim that it was just a "sarcastic suggestion." Can't you be more consistent than that?
kasi nga, hindi ka man ang gumagawa ng paraan na kausapin ako tungkol sa bagay na ito. you could've aked me it i was serious when i said those words.
as i've said it was a sarcastic suggestion at that time so how can i not be consistent... kung si lara nga nung sabihan ko (that time i really meant it at nandun kayo) mag-death by tampon cya kasi nga nagawa nyang tablahin yung pillow on gig night mismo eh naki-usap agad sa akin para i clear yung situation nya... ikaw, nag-text ka kaagad kay selena... nakuwento ko nga kay charles nung isang araw at nagulat sya sa naging decision mo because the whole time he thought na nag-aasaran lang tayo...
uulitin ko lang, "- not guilty... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past..."
kilala mo sarili mo ayn... kung etong entry nga na ito na muntik mo ma-misinterpret "been very busy for the past few days with work... also, i haven't gotten over the death of FPJ... i'm also having problems with 2 bands of mine, one lacks a drummer while the other... i'm being forced to look for a new bassist...
for the last time, wala pa akong tinatanggal sa candy epro kung gusto mong panindigan ang lahat eh wala na akong magagawa... i've stated my point, kung mag mga items ako na di ko nasama which would prove my case, ok lang... selena is right, this is an issue which we should settle personally but i will not be the one to make the first move...
oo nga pala, so far sobrang happy pa rin ng 2005 ko...
"not wanting to become a part" - this is a result of your texting selana bout what you felt about what i said to you that night without even asking me if i did meant what i said that night. in all honesty, wala sa akin yun. if i really meant that, hindi na kita pinagbigyan sa request mong kumain pa tayo sa timog... i learned nalang about it nung ikinuwento sa akin ni selena at nang tanungin nya ako kung pinag-quit kita... nagulat nga pala ako. sabi ko pa nga sa kanya "ah kaya pala nya kinukuha yung bass at yung guitar nya..." if you know me, d ganun ang style ko... there are only 2 ways that i do if i'm going to kick someone out of the band. one is d ko papaalam sa kanya na tanggal na sya and the other is i'll say it to him/her directly... kung yung ginawa/pagaalaska mo nung gabing yun ang dahilan para alisin kita sa banda eh ang babaw ko naman at lalabas naman akong napaka-insecure...
the only one who kicked someone out of the band is you so don't point a finger at me... a suggestion is different from a desicion both in spelling and in meaning meaning...
------You admitted it yourself when you didn't protest that time when I texted you that "it wasn't my decision." And then I read this on the blog: “..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”--which, you said so yourself, was directed at me. Now, you claim that it was just a "sarcastic suggestion." Can't you be more consistent than that?
kasi nga, hindi ka man ang gumagawa ng paraan na kausapin ako tungkol sa bagay na ito. you could've aked me it i was serious when i said those words.
as i've said it was a sarcastic suggestion at that time so how can i not be consistent... kung si lara nga nung sabihan ko (that time i really meant it at nandun kayo) mag-death by tampon cya kasi nga nagawa nyang tablahin yung pillow on gig night mismo eh naki-usap agad sa akin para i clear yung situation nya... ikaw, nag-text ka kaagad kay selena... nakuwento ko nga kay charles nung isang araw at nagulat sya sa naging decision mo because the whole time he thought na nag-aasaran lang tayo...
uulitin ko lang, "- not guilty... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past..."
kilala mo sarili mo ayn... kung etong entry nga na ito na muntik mo ma-misinterpret "been very busy for the past few days with work... also, i haven't gotten over the death of FPJ... i'm also having problems with 2 bands of mine, one lacks a drummer while the other... i'm being forced to look for a new bassist...
for the last time, wala pa akong tinatanggal sa candy epro kung gusto mong panindigan ang lahat eh wala na akong magagawa... i've stated my point, kung mag mga items ako na di ko nasama which would prove my case, ok lang... selena is right, this is an issue which we should settle personally but i will not be the one to make the first move...
oo nga pala, so far sobrang happy pa rin ng 2005 ko...
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Twisting the Facts
Allan dear, there's a big difference between "not wanting to become a part" and "getting kicked out."
You admitted it yourself when you didn't protest that time when I texted you that "it wasn't my decision." And then I read this on the blog: “..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”--which, you said so yourself, was directed at me. Now, you claim that it was just a "sarcastic suggestion." Can't you be more consistent than that?
"- not guilty... i did not do such a thing... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past..."
Or did you?
Oh well. Happy 2005! ;)
You admitted it yourself when you didn't protest that time when I texted you that "it wasn't my decision." And then I read this on the blog: “..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”--which, you said so yourself, was directed at me. Now, you claim that it was just a "sarcastic suggestion." Can't you be more consistent than that?
"- not guilty... i did not do such a thing... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past..."
Or did you?
Oh well. Happy 2005! ;)
sige
i resolved not to say anything at first, but i can't resist.
sige. sumbatan na lang kayong dalawa diyan for everyone to see. entertainment naman 'to, di ba? (ewan ko... nabasa ko lang kasi somewhere sometime last year na nakakaentertain talaga ang mga ganito.) whatever happened to talking it out in person? hindi naman kayo magkaka-eksena lang na kailangan pang i-post sa blog o kung saan man sa internet. o ganun na ba kalala ang sitwasyon niyong dalawa... o ganun na ba kalaki ang mga pride ninyo?
sabagay... at least pati ito ay NADOCUMENT na rin. yehey.
alam kong walang kuwenta tong post ko and it probably won't help things to be resolved at all, pero KEBS. oo na... ako yung bleeding heart wuss ng banda, the mother-figure who tries to keep everyone together, but the thing is: we're all adults here. both of you can do whatever the hell you want to do, as long as you accept the consequences of your words or actions. i respect your opinions and emotions, but i'm amazed at the fact that you're willing to put all this in the blog. yay, drama. ang saya-saya. and of course, nothing changes. i'm still the fence-sitter, as always, though i'm ready if anyone tries to push me off the fence.
deal with it. sure, we're a motley crew and we have too many faults to produce an album and too many commitments to play regularly. eh anong magagawa natin? eh sa ganun ang sitwasyon. as i said, we're adults, and we can choose to live with each other and these conditions or not (cue violins). tumatanda na tayo, and i can think of worse things to happen in this world, REALLY. i'm just going to roll with the punches because there's nothing else i can do. meanwhile, i at least got my half-cent worth in.
sige. sumbatan na lang kayong dalawa diyan for everyone to see. entertainment naman 'to, di ba? (ewan ko... nabasa ko lang kasi somewhere sometime last year na nakakaentertain talaga ang mga ganito.) whatever happened to talking it out in person? hindi naman kayo magkaka-eksena lang na kailangan pang i-post sa blog o kung saan man sa internet. o ganun na ba kalala ang sitwasyon niyong dalawa... o ganun na ba kalaki ang mga pride ninyo?
sabagay... at least pati ito ay NADOCUMENT na rin. yehey.
alam kong walang kuwenta tong post ko and it probably won't help things to be resolved at all, pero KEBS. oo na... ako yung bleeding heart wuss ng banda, the mother-figure who tries to keep everyone together, but the thing is: we're all adults here. both of you can do whatever the hell you want to do, as long as you accept the consequences of your words or actions. i respect your opinions and emotions, but i'm amazed at the fact that you're willing to put all this in the blog. yay, drama. ang saya-saya. and of course, nothing changes. i'm still the fence-sitter, as always, though i'm ready if anyone tries to push me off the fence.
deal with it. sure, we're a motley crew and we have too many faults to produce an album and too many commitments to play regularly. eh anong magagawa natin? eh sa ganun ang sitwasyon. as i said, we're adults, and we can choose to live with each other and these conditions or not (cue violins). tumatanda na tayo, and i can think of worse things to happen in this world, REALLY. i'm just going to roll with the punches because there's nothing else i can do. meanwhile, i at least got my half-cent worth in.
my reply to you ayn...
“..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”
yup i was referring to you... but what i said that night was not a "DECISION" but merely a "SARCASTIC SUGGESTION" in reaction to what you kept on insisting that night... if you took it seriously wala na akong magagawa doon... i was just being sarcastic that night kasi ang layo na ng pinanggalingan namin at pumunta ami para makita lang kayo pero ano napala ko... pangungutya at pang-iinsulto. okey you were drunk that night, pagod naman ako... you should've asked me muna if i was dead serious when i said those words("huwag ka nalang kaya mag-candy... blah blah) to you...
"I didn’t find it fair for you to twist the facts so hastily just so all the blame can only be put on my head."
- not guilty... i did not do such a thing... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past...
“..that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed”
sorry ayn but i wasn't referring to you when wrote this... this is for anyone who might be interested in sessioning for candy... pwedeng kapalit mo, kapalit ko, ni roel or ni ralph... so far si selena lang naman yung pinaka available anytime... if you don't believe me eh wala na akong magagawa...
“last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...”
- again i was referring to interested people...
"Whatever your reasons were, I just wish that you could have been more honest when you wanted the readers of this blog to know about you, “doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who… don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline".
this is honest... i wanted the reaqders of the blog to know about candyaudioline not just me... this is what i wrote... "we'll be more active using the option of doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who can't make it to gigs due to prior important commitments, or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline. don't worry, we'll be very careful with the people that we choose."
yup i was referring to you... but what i said that night was not a "DECISION" but merely a "SARCASTIC SUGGESTION" in reaction to what you kept on insisting that night... if you took it seriously wala na akong magagawa doon... i was just being sarcastic that night kasi ang layo na ng pinanggalingan namin at pumunta ami para makita lang kayo pero ano napala ko... pangungutya at pang-iinsulto. okey you were drunk that night, pagod naman ako... you should've asked me muna if i was dead serious when i said those words("huwag ka nalang kaya mag-candy... blah blah) to you...
"I didn’t find it fair for you to twist the facts so hastily just so all the blame can only be put on my head."
- not guilty... i did not do such a thing... i suck strickly according to my recollections of what transpired last night based on others things that happened in the past...
“..that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed”
sorry ayn but i wasn't referring to you when wrote this... this is for anyone who might be interested in sessioning for candy... pwedeng kapalit mo, kapalit ko, ni roel or ni ralph... so far si selena lang naman yung pinaka available anytime... if you don't believe me eh wala na akong magagawa...
“last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...”
- again i was referring to interested people...
"Whatever your reasons were, I just wish that you could have been more honest when you wanted the readers of this blog to know about you, “doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who… don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline".
this is honest... i wanted the reaqders of the blog to know about candyaudioline not just me... this is what i wrote... "we'll be more active using the option of doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who can't make it to gigs due to prior important commitments, or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline. don't worry, we'll be very careful with the people that we choose."
For Allan
“..or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline...”
Dear Allan,
I did not say, and neither did I imply, that I no longer want to become a part of Candyaudioline. As I texted you a few days ago: it was YOUR DECISION, YOU SUGGESTED IT and I merely agreed to the decision that YOU ALREADY MADE.
As much as I didn’t want to bring this issue out in the open, it was you who already brought it up by stating such a line (quoted above) and I feel that it is only right for me to correct the false statement that was obviously directed at me. Whatever “petty and irrational” reason there is behind all this, I didn’t find it fair for you to twist the facts so hastily just so all the blame can only be put on my head.
“..that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed”
Who was expecting fame or fortune from the band? You know, if this is the only thing that I ever wanted from the band, I should have never accepted your invitation four years ago (or is it 5 already?), in the first place. Furthermore, I shouldn’t have wasted my effort in putting up with you for the past years; I shouldn’t have pushed myself to learn the basslines to the songs and to do so much better with my skills just to please you; I shouldn’t have persistently searched for a new singer, one after another, just so Candyaudioline could continue to play; I shouldn’t have welcomed the idea of opening up my mind a bit more just so I could appreciate shoegaze music and the music that we play…
Sure, I had my share of faults in the past years (as a bandmate and as a friend) and I don’t deny them. I am aware that there had been many times when I can be so stubborn about numerous “petty and irrational things” and carelessly affect the band; I am aware that I can be so childish when it comes to my decisions and my actions in public (and you have always hated that); I am aware that I oftentimes become too criticizing of the band.
The last time I texted you, you replied, “Bakit ko nga ba sina-gest yun. Isipin mo mabuti yung mga pinagsasabi mo nung gabing yun. Lasing ka man o hindi, ganun lagi ang opinion mo sa banda. Laging negative.” You tell me who, among our members, hasn’t uttered a “negative line” about us? We have all been criticizing ourselves all these years—precisely why we have never released the EP/LP that we’ve recorded THRICE.
Why not try listening to yourself everytime you talk? May it be about other bands or our band? You too, always have something “negative” to say—even to some of those who are part of the PRESENT Buzznite bands. Hindi na nga lang kami pumapalag sayo.
On my part, even if I do have some negative sentiments about our band, I also have my share of praises. Apparently, you only remember the criticisms.
I do tell you if I think that we played really well at a gig. I share stories about positive things that I hear about us. I’ve posted entries (here and on my blog) that show how proud I am to be a part of Candyaudioline. Ask Selena whenever I talk about our gigs when we are at the gym. Or better yet, why don’t you ask Kelvin about what I was telling him about candyaudioline and about YOU minutes before you arrived at Conspiracy that night when you told me to leave the band.
“last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...”
I only cared to be criticizing towards us because I didn’t want us to remain stagnant. Having played for several other bands from different scenes, I can’t help but sometimes compare and consequently think about how much deserving we are to be exposed to other gigs other than where we usually play. I tell you negative comments because I thought that as a bandmate, it’s only okay for me to tell you my OPINIONS about our situation and my OPINIONS on what should be done (may they be applicable to us or not). I thought that as a friend, I should be honest about things such as this. All this time, mali pala ako.
It’s been 4 or 5 years that I’ve been with candyaudioline… You are very much familiar with how I express myself. You knew I’d say something the last time I was with you and Kelvin. You knew me very well. When you asked me why I still play with Candyaudioline, I replied that, (despite my negative sentiments) it’s because my loyalty has been with our band and that I see “us” not only as a band but as close friends. You only made faces when I gave you that answer.
You were sober that night, you should have remembered. It’s beyond my control if you choose to ignore. Perhaps, you were just waiting for an opportunity to kick me out of the band.
Whatever your reasons were, I just wish that you could have been more honest when you wanted the readers of this blog to know about you, “doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who… don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline.”
Sincerely,
Ayn
Dear Allan,
I did not say, and neither did I imply, that I no longer want to become a part of Candyaudioline. As I texted you a few days ago: it was YOUR DECISION, YOU SUGGESTED IT and I merely agreed to the decision that YOU ALREADY MADE.
As much as I didn’t want to bring this issue out in the open, it was you who already brought it up by stating such a line (quoted above) and I feel that it is only right for me to correct the false statement that was obviously directed at me. Whatever “petty and irrational” reason there is behind all this, I didn’t find it fair for you to twist the facts so hastily just so all the blame can only be put on my head.
“..that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed”
Who was expecting fame or fortune from the band? You know, if this is the only thing that I ever wanted from the band, I should have never accepted your invitation four years ago (or is it 5 already?), in the first place. Furthermore, I shouldn’t have wasted my effort in putting up with you for the past years; I shouldn’t have pushed myself to learn the basslines to the songs and to do so much better with my skills just to please you; I shouldn’t have persistently searched for a new singer, one after another, just so Candyaudioline could continue to play; I shouldn’t have welcomed the idea of opening up my mind a bit more just so I could appreciate shoegaze music and the music that we play…
Sure, I had my share of faults in the past years (as a bandmate and as a friend) and I don’t deny them. I am aware that there had been many times when I can be so stubborn about numerous “petty and irrational things” and carelessly affect the band; I am aware that I can be so childish when it comes to my decisions and my actions in public (and you have always hated that); I am aware that I oftentimes become too criticizing of the band.
The last time I texted you, you replied, “Bakit ko nga ba sina-gest yun. Isipin mo mabuti yung mga pinagsasabi mo nung gabing yun. Lasing ka man o hindi, ganun lagi ang opinion mo sa banda. Laging negative.” You tell me who, among our members, hasn’t uttered a “negative line” about us? We have all been criticizing ourselves all these years—precisely why we have never released the EP/LP that we’ve recorded THRICE.
Why not try listening to yourself everytime you talk? May it be about other bands or our band? You too, always have something “negative” to say—even to some of those who are part of the PRESENT Buzznite bands. Hindi na nga lang kami pumapalag sayo.
On my part, even if I do have some negative sentiments about our band, I also have my share of praises. Apparently, you only remember the criticisms.
I do tell you if I think that we played really well at a gig. I share stories about positive things that I hear about us. I’ve posted entries (here and on my blog) that show how proud I am to be a part of Candyaudioline. Ask Selena whenever I talk about our gigs when we are at the gym. Or better yet, why don’t you ask Kelvin about what I was telling him about candyaudioline and about YOU minutes before you arrived at Conspiracy that night when you told me to leave the band.
“last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...”
I only cared to be criticizing towards us because I didn’t want us to remain stagnant. Having played for several other bands from different scenes, I can’t help but sometimes compare and consequently think about how much deserving we are to be exposed to other gigs other than where we usually play. I tell you negative comments because I thought that as a bandmate, it’s only okay for me to tell you my OPINIONS about our situation and my OPINIONS on what should be done (may they be applicable to us or not). I thought that as a friend, I should be honest about things such as this. All this time, mali pala ako.
It’s been 4 or 5 years that I’ve been with candyaudioline… You are very much familiar with how I express myself. You knew I’d say something the last time I was with you and Kelvin. You knew me very well. When you asked me why I still play with Candyaudioline, I replied that, (despite my negative sentiments) it’s because my loyalty has been with our band and that I see “us” not only as a band but as close friends. You only made faces when I gave you that answer.
You were sober that night, you should have remembered. It’s beyond my control if you choose to ignore. Perhaps, you were just waiting for an opportunity to kick me out of the band.
Whatever your reasons were, I just wish that you could have been more honest when you wanted the readers of this blog to know about you, “doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who… don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline.”
Sincerely,
Ayn
Saturday, January 01, 2005
goodbye 2004... hello 2005
hi everyone,
2004's been a great year for candyaudioline in spite of the unfulfilled (cd release) promises, the cancelled gigs, the hospitalization of, would you believe, all the members of the band, the crappy gigs and that very stupid LJ issue that led to the "purification process" of the local "indie" movement...
it was in this year that this once "great" band (ngayon yata greatest na eh, hehehe... huwag mag react, sasapakin ko ang kokontra) saw very little action due to far more important life shaping matters that some of its band members had to undergo...
but in spite of this, we're still here waiting for the rest to catch up with us... hopefully this year, we'll be more active using the option of doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who can't make it to gigs due to prior important commitments, or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline. don't worry, we'll be very careful with the people that we choose. in fact i've already made up a criteria for qualification. and it's just quite a few and very simple things that we'll consider. one is that he/she has to be familiar with nymphetz. it's located along roosvelt ave. near Bayantel. next is that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed. last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...
as for BUZZ Night...
2004 has been sort of a renewal of sorts... at first i thought it was all downhill during the middle of the year due to lack of bands who wanted to play. some of the great bands and personalities of the local indie scene decided that it was no longer cool being a part of the buzz... but still i decided to carry on to a point that i had to line up three of my bands just to beef up the line-up. along the way we got to discover new bands / friends that in their own little way have helped yours truly sustain this once prestigious little monthly event called buzz night.
special mention goes to "popular days", "tether" and "sunsetdrive" for being there everytime there's a buzz night and "in between days" thingie. etong tatlong ito ang inaasahan kong mag-aahon ng buzz night sa putahan este putikan pala ... to "bagetsafonik" and NineInchNails este "Switch" for bringing in huge crowds everytime they're lined up for buzz night... to Millennia and tiffany for the extra venue and for making me stay to watch Tether... to candy ayn for some of the extra bands na pinapasokline-up nya during the "low point" months last year... to tether joel for helping me out with lining up other bands (pwera lang yung may maitim na titeh) to mike "dorothy" and wally "balloon derby" sa pag-salo dun sa mga time na late na ako nung mga early months... to sirs charles and jannpol "popular nymphetz", dahil sa inyo may soft pillow kisses pa rin at pansamntalang nabuhay ang nymphetz este superminty... sa mga taong pumapasyal sa mayrics during buzz nights, salamat sa inyo, ilang buwan nalang ay makakabili na ako ng kotse (joke lang) salamat... syempre, to girlfriend/bandmate/konsensya selena, she helps me manage buzz night, huuawawah naman pag naiiwan ko sya mag-isang hawakan and buzz night... ganun din sa mayrics salamat, sana sa pagpasok ng bagong taon eh bago na rin ang mga gamit nyo... oo nga pala, to my aspirin bandmates salamat at pinagbigyan nyo ako nung dec 26 kahit walang practice after nearly 4 years not playing and with just a days notice. you guys helped me end buzz night 2004 with a great big BANG!!! di ko pa rin makalimutan yung feeling of extreme ecstasy while ending our set with that 8 minute song "count to four"... sana this year eh makarami pa tayo at makapag-record na tayo!
2004's been a great year for candyaudioline in spite of the unfulfilled (cd release) promises, the cancelled gigs, the hospitalization of, would you believe, all the members of the band, the crappy gigs and that very stupid LJ issue that led to the "purification process" of the local "indie" movement...
it was in this year that this once "great" band (ngayon yata greatest na eh, hehehe... huwag mag react, sasapakin ko ang kokontra) saw very little action due to far more important life shaping matters that some of its band members had to undergo...
but in spite of this, we're still here waiting for the rest to catch up with us... hopefully this year, we'll be more active using the option of doing a rotation of willing friends sessioning for members of the band who can't make it to gigs due to prior important commitments, or even those who don't want to be a part anymore of this truly unique yet often misunderstood entity called candyaudioline. don't worry, we'll be very careful with the people that we choose. in fact i've already made up a criteria for qualification. and it's just quite a few and very simple things that we'll consider. one is that he/she has to be familiar with nymphetz. it's located along roosvelt ave. near Bayantel. next is that he/she is willing to play without expecting any fame or fortune from this very noble deed. last and most important of all... dapat FRIEND...
as for BUZZ Night...
2004 has been sort of a renewal of sorts... at first i thought it was all downhill during the middle of the year due to lack of bands who wanted to play. some of the great bands and personalities of the local indie scene decided that it was no longer cool being a part of the buzz... but still i decided to carry on to a point that i had to line up three of my bands just to beef up the line-up. along the way we got to discover new bands / friends that in their own little way have helped yours truly sustain this once prestigious little monthly event called buzz night.
special mention goes to "popular days", "tether" and "sunsetdrive" for being there everytime there's a buzz night and "in between days" thingie. etong tatlong ito ang inaasahan kong mag-aahon ng buzz night sa putahan este putikan pala ... to "bagetsafonik" and NineInchNails este "Switch" for bringing in huge crowds everytime they're lined up for buzz night... to Millennia and tiffany for the extra venue and for making me stay to watch Tether... to candy ayn for some of the extra bands na pinapasokline-up nya during the "low point" months last year... to tether joel for helping me out with lining up other bands (pwera lang yung may maitim na titeh) to mike "dorothy" and wally "balloon derby" sa pag-salo dun sa mga time na late na ako nung mga early months... to sirs charles and jannpol "popular nymphetz", dahil sa inyo may soft pillow kisses pa rin at pansamntalang nabuhay ang nymphetz este superminty... sa mga taong pumapasyal sa mayrics during buzz nights, salamat sa inyo, ilang buwan nalang ay makakabili na ako ng kotse (joke lang) salamat... syempre, to girlfriend/bandmate/konsensya selena, she helps me manage buzz night, huuawawah naman pag naiiwan ko sya mag-isang hawakan and buzz night... ganun din sa mayrics salamat, sana sa pagpasok ng bagong taon eh bago na rin ang mga gamit nyo... oo nga pala, to my aspirin bandmates salamat at pinagbigyan nyo ako nung dec 26 kahit walang practice after nearly 4 years not playing and with just a days notice. you guys helped me end buzz night 2004 with a great big BANG!!! di ko pa rin makalimutan yung feeling of extreme ecstasy while ending our set with that 8 minute song "count to four"... sana this year eh makarami pa tayo at makapag-record na tayo!
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