Tuesday, April 29, 2003

hay naku! 3 weeks pala ha! akala ko ba 3 days lang! hmmp... baka hindi si lara ang pakantahin ko... i'm eyeing a transvestite who looks like alma conception! hehehehe... hay naku... d man lang tyayo nakagala kung saan saan... i miss going to rockwell, eastwood, alabang town, podiun and greenbelt... grabe, i recently gained 12lbs due to my "i have SARS syndrome"... bahala bahala see you guys tomorrow!!!
hay naku kabobohan...

I typed a long entry a while ago straight onto this post. when I was finished, instead of posting it, i went to my other blog. hayyyyyyyyy... nawala lahat.

tinatamad tuloy ako. anyway, I just wrote about me leaving for Bukidnon after the Summer Slam. I'll be there for almost 3 weeks, but I don't think that means that candyaudioline will be offline. Allan is thinking of having Lara from SPK session, or he'll do it himself. sila pa rin naman yun, kaya worth it din pumunta sa gigs. tuloy ang ligaya.

mamimiss ko kayo boohoohoo... i'll try to update even while i'm in Bukidnon. Sana makapost na ulit dito sina Ayn. Bye!

Saturday, April 26, 2003

You guys probably think I’m such an ass for not updating the blog when I’ve finally graduated and supposedly have nothing more important to do… WRONG! Let’s just say that UP is not the most efficient office during summer enlistment…

Anyway, I am here to talk about our Subic activity. We had all agreed to meet at Jollibee EDSA/Kamias at 12 noon, Black Saturday. Surprise. Jollibee was closed. But that was ok too because we didn’t have to buy anything to be able to park. Ayn and I had only been there a minute when Ralph and Charmaine arrived, together with Erap and Dodong of The Youth. Robert and Rosa arrived around 20 minutes later, but still no sign of Allan and the Youth Van. At around 1 or 1:30, it finally arrived and we were off. We picked up Sir Charles and John Paul on the way, stopped over at Shell North Expressway for a late lunch, and THEN straight for Subic. How can I describe the trip… it was long and yet short. It felt long, but when we got there, we didn’t expect to get there so soon. The ride wasn’t really a barrel of laughs as I had hoped because most of us lacked sleep and we were just staring off into space or listening to our own music. Allan brought out his compilations… meron pa siyang Doolittle ng Pixies so kantahan yung iba. Revised especially for the Knights: “Here comes your maaan—YAK!!!” It never ends.

All the bands were there so it was just a matter of meeting them inside Subic. Of course, we got lost because of the weirdly printed map (hooray for SBMA)… and when we got to the Admiral House, the bands were just leaving for a motorcade. We were tired and weewee so we decided to rest for a bit and nix the parade. Ayn and I had our picture taken in front of the stairs, as usual… ang gaganda namin ;} We went to the venue ahead of everyone else to check out the sound system. Bad trip kasi the field was one gigantic ant hill and so I was a prime target in my slippers. Hmm… at least may karamay na sina 8, 2ts at Enzo ng Cheese hehehe. Wala si Roel nung soundcheck namin kasi sumama siya sa motorcade so si Gilbert ang pumalo. Ang bagal ng Flaming Walls tapos naging dance yung Empty You. Pero maganda yung soundcheck. Feeling ko kuha na namin yung actual performance later that night. Pinakain kami ng masarap na fried chicken at pizza ng organizer… kaya lang, where were the drinks??? Ang tagal dumating. Medyo hindi nga sila organized, sabi nina Allan, kasi nagkaproblema yung ibang banda sa tulugan tapos sa venue mismo weird: walang portalet, wala masyadong security… may pulitika pa yatang involved dun, courtesy of the Gordon-Payumo feud. Hay naku, buti pa yung candy, cowboy kaya walang hassle kasi wala kaming expectations!

Come the performance, we discovered that our soundcheck was of no use because the technicians had moved the settings for the showband prior to us, and they didn’t bother to put it back. Oh well. Hindi naman kami star dun, di ba? And we’re used to crap, as always. Still, we gave good head hehe :D Este… we did good ;) After that, wala na kaming problema. Naglakad lang kami o kaya tumambay sa van. Sina Allan at Roel nga lang, may trabaho, so yun muna inatupag nila (hehe, ows??? Biro lang. Oo naman ;). Oh yeah. It WAS hot in the van, more so because there was absolutely no wind that night despite being near the sea, and there were no toilets nearby. Kung ano pang adventure ang ginawa namin para makaihi.

By the way, this is the perfect opportunity to shout out our thanks to the closing crew of Dunkin Donuts Subic. Kahit closed na sila ay naawa sila samin ni Ayn at pina-CR nila kami. Don’t worry, hindi naman kami goons, di ba? Mukha lang.

No gig sked yet excpet for Pulp Summer Slam on the 30th at Amoranto Stadium (around 6 kami tutugtog), but keep posted. I PROMISE I will, too.

Friday, April 18, 2003

So we did the Millenia gig with Kamikazee and Cheese, as Allan said. For me, I thought we performed well… except for my dear, old waterloo, “Felt so Fine” hehehe. But I don’t mind. Nabawi ko naman eh. Ayn and I went home early because I didn’t want to stay out with the car. Remember, Holy Week din nung na-carnap ako.

Last night Ayn took Allan, Charles, Eric, John Paul and me to her house for a movie marathon. As usual, candyaudioline wasn’t complete; Roel and Ralph were asleep, I think. Allan had the bright idea of letting John Paul take us all in Ayn’s pick-up for a drive to the convenience store to get drinks and food. Damn, that was scary. We looked so funny because we were taking pictures with the baby in front of the beer fridge and the Cheetos. While we were driving back to the house, a school of teens on their way to the grotto were milling in front of the car. Charles and eric, who were on the back of the pick-up, distinctly heard some of them saying, “Di ba si Vendetta [of Salbakuta] yun?” hahaha.

We watched “Splendor” which is a trite, perky, less sexy version of “Threesome”. It was ok… kissing men are always worth endless minutes of blah comedy. My favorite part in real life, though, was when Popular Days and Allan were making faces and shuddering when the actors kissed. What the hell is wrong with them? They can like lesbian love… it follows that I can like gay love ;) Anyway, the movie was cute. But I understand why I had never heard of it before.

Next, we watched “The Eye”. That is, they watched it, I just slept through most of it or played with Tristania. I had already watched it with Ayn and Allan, and I wasn’t interested in making myself unnecessarily scared since I was going home to an empty house later that night. Ayn wanted to watch the parts where she closed her eyes (my fault—nahawa kasi siya sa takot ko dati!). Anyway, we finished our beers, our movie, our fundador and moved to the porch. After a lot of begging from Allan, Ayn brought her guitar out and the guys started singing “Upside Down” by Two Minds Crack. Yecchhh. I mean, I used to like the song, man, but that was before they started making it a staple of high school dances and pinoy mobiles. It’s right up there with “Somebody” and “Promise” (Incidentally, John Paul insisted on singing the former, too). They sang a lot of indie tunes, too, which was nice. Allan kept changing the lyrics to make it silly—it was so funny. He has a knack for making instant lyrics that not only sound funny but fit the melody, too. Ano kaya kung gumawa din siya ng gagong song for candy? Ay oo nga pala… tigang pala siya ngayon sa kanta…

Speaking of tigang, ang babastos talaga ng mga Knights na Nagte-Table kagabi. All throughout, may mga hirit sila about their favorite establishment, Romeo’s, and other hints about their quest for libido satisfaction.

We decided to pack up around 4 am. The ride to Philcoa was fun because we suddenly started talking about 80’s one-hit wonders that make you really wonder why they became hits. Examples: “Rumors” (Look at all these rumors…), “Shake body dancer” (Shake, body, body dancer…), “Nineteen six to eight”, “Brother Louie”, “Jungle life (or Night)” and “Rico Mambo”. Alam pa ni Allan yung sayaw sa huli hehehe. Basta, we were laughing about it all on the way home. Sana ganun kasaya yung biyahe bukas sa Subic.

Yehey! Bukas na yun! Wooooohoooooo!
grabe ang drama mo, allan. what is it exactly that you expect from the band? are we not up to par anymore?

allan, popular days and I went to Ayn's today to have our movie marathon. that is, we went yesterday and only got back today at 4 am. it was fun. will update later.

Thursday, April 17, 2003

Howdy everyone...

holy midweek but it seems like hell for me for the past couple of days... well, it looks as if i'll be stuck like this for the mean time...

funny, a while ago we played a gig at mellennia and it was so strange because i felt very awkward for the first time... maybe i was just tired (work sucks as always) or maybe i'm getting old... i felt i was singing out of tune for the majority of the set... well there's always a time for a comeback... come to think of it, it was supposed to be a hundred percent fun thing... i didn't experience the fun aspect of the gig that time... maybe there's something wrong with me... maybe i'm beginning to expect something from the band... or maybe this is just a pathetic excuse for not being to write a song for candyaudioline for almost a year now... it's not like me actually... in the early days, a song would come out every now and then but now, even if i excert maximum effort, i always come out with a lousy tune... i'm getting scared of realising that all the things that i did sprung out from "tsamba" or plain stupid luck... here i go again, bathing in doubt... submerged in the idea of drying up just when things are beginning to shape up to my advantage...

enough of that for the meantime... all i ever dreamt of when i was growing up was to become a very successful basketball player... but here i am, both feet on the ground shoegazing all the time...

this is what i'm feeling right this very moment taken from a soft pillow kisses song:

no more beauty, always weary... i try to smile but i end up teary... i just won't open my eyes, for sight it depresses... depresses...depresses...

i just hope that i could get off of this depressed state the soonest possible time...


Wednesday, April 16, 2003

Hoy!!!

Ang tagal nating di nagkita ano? Tinatamad pa nga ako eh. Ibu-bullet ko na nga lang:

1. Pulp pictorial—we met each other at around 8:30 am at McDonald’s EDSA. That is, Ayn and Ralph and I did. As usual, Allan and Roel came late with Gilbert. Eloha came a little earlier than them (she CAME! Oh… Ohhhh… Ohhhhhhhh! Ops, Sir Charles, huminahon… ;). We waited a REALLY long time for Lara, who was recovering from a hangover, before we started on to Makati. We arrived at Green Planet a few minutes after 10 and we were really proud of our punctuality. There were about three bands who were already there, so we were thinking that we would be done right away. The problem was that the photographer showed up really late and they let other bands have their picture taken before ours even if they came later than us. Bad trip! Ang init init sa loob tapos ang tagal-tagal naming naghintay bago kami kinuhanan. Buti na lang Roel requested that Soft Pillow and candyaudioline have their pictures taken against this cool altar in the corner. We were different from everyone else :) Lalo kaming nagulat nung sinabi ni Vernon Go na solo shots para sa members ng candy! Kahit na 2:30 pm na kami inasikaso, sulit kasi cool yung backdrop tsaka solo pa. Ang arte namin hehe. Parang hindi indie! So after that, Ralph and Charms and I went to Ayn’s house and pigged out on their food, plus Ababu take-out. Good day.

2. Last Friday, Ayn went to our house to CRS; except that it wasn’t functional yet, so nagkayayaan na lang ng inuman. Allan said he could come, but he didn’t. Ralph said he’d try, but he didn’t. Roel said he was in Cebu. So it ended up being just Chris and Ayn and Me. Okay lang. Parang slow down ek-ek. Nge! Ang galing kasi ng mga kabanda namin.

3. Practice kami sa Alberto’s dapat ng midnight nung Sunday. Allan was already practicing inside Mang Sam’s with SPK. Wala pa si Roel ng 1:30 nung lumabas yung SPK. They called him up and it turns out he was asleep! Siya pa yung nagyaya ng practice. We called it off kasi tinamad na rin kami. Kumain na lang kami sa Pares Place kina Ralph. Bad trip kasi ubos na yung pares. Order kami ni Chris ng bulalo. Yakkeee. Will never do that again.

4. Monday, April 14—it was our Mayric’s night along with Soapdish and Blue Ketchup. The whole day I kept hearing the plug for our gig on NU at natuwa ako. I thought some people would actually show up. That afternoon, I took care of graduation clearance at UP, which entailed walking from one building to another. I think I got heat exhaustion because I became so sleepy and nauseated. I actually didn’t wake up in time for Ayn’s arrival. I had to rush and put on a bra, etc…. haha. (Buti nga nakapagbra pa!). Ang sakit ng ulo ko nun. Chris bought a pack of cigs at the Ministop in Espana and filled the plastic with ice. I had a makeshift ice pack! It helped me recover enough to perform. Wala masyadong tao. Binaboy ko pa yung “felt so fine”, as usual. Pero ok naman as a whole. Si Roel pumapalya na naman. Sabi ba naman niya samin ni Ayn, “Uy, practice uli tayo… pumapangit na naman tayo eh!” Nagtinginan kami ni Ayn. Sabay pa kami eh: “Ikaw lang yun, no!” Haha. Si Jeff ng Soapdish, tuwng tuwa; kinanta niya yung start ng “Pretend We’re Smart” tsaka ginitara yung intro ng “Better View”. Tawanan kami nina Ralph. Ayaw nilang lumabas after that kasi wala daw silang pera. Nag Una Sikat Pares na lang kami nina Chris at Ayn. Sarap.

Tonight, we’re going to be fronting for Kamikazee at Millenia. Punta kayo. On the 19th, we’ll be at Subic with all the Backbeat Bands. CRS muna si Ayn tapos kain kami sa Ababu.

Sunday, April 13, 2003

been very busy. have practice later at Mang Sam's. will post tomorrow morning and include update about pulp pictorial. bye.

Tuesday, April 08, 2003

putcha! pictorial na mamaya!

maaga ako kasi susunduin ako ni ayn para maaga kaming magmeet ng candy. para hindi mabastos ang magazine sa aming lateness. anyway... yun. kinakabahan ako.

tangina talaga yung girlfriend ng ex-friend ko!dating jay of kamikazee andwaiting to make her his new cash cow!!!

wala lang... just expressing myself. sorry.

oh yeah... i saw the pics in this months issue. astig. pero kawawa naman si Ayn... nagmukha tuloy na si Roel atAllan yung founder ng banda eh siya yung kumuha kay Roel.At kebs kung forever ko nang miniss- spell ang pangalan ni Roel heheheh...

Saturday, April 05, 2003

the original look is always the best, so i'm putting it back onto the orange background.
Kakapagusap lang namin ni Allan kanina sa phone. I guess he was bored—well, I was, too! Hooray! Blogger is fixed! Tuloy ang ligaya sa pagpopost…

Bukas na nga lang kami magmomovie marathon. Ayn texted me a while ago, asking for the number of the anonymous texter from Thursday evening because she had also received an anonymous text. I couldn’t really reply because I had no load so I asked Allan to text her for me that I had erased the number already (wala namang kuwenta yung nagtext sakin, just wanted to pick me up :P… sinabi na ngang may boyfriend na ako eh). Buti pa yung isang guy na galing all the way from Sta. Rosa—mabuhay ka, dude! We really appreciate that.

Super bored today. That was all Allan and I talked about really… plus fear of plane crashes and pictorials hehehehe. Anyway, looking forward to tomorrow’s couch potato trip with the band.
hi!

(eto na po selena, magpopost na po ako)

seems like you've said it all...

well, here's but a few updates regarding candyaudioline...

i think our gig this april 14 at Mayrics will push thru as scheduled...PNE management might take the 21st (which we might also graze) instead of the 14th. aside from that, we might also play on the 16 at milenya again supporting KAMIKAZEE and CHEESE... We'll sure miss buzz night which will be on the 12th... we're all looking forward to the summer slam gig this april 30...

my thoughts on the interview: well i'm quite happy that we're through with it... it went really well with all of us giving our own insights and answers concerning the band and the scene that it represents... it was fun actually, in fact we had loads of laughs that my nape got stiff most of the time... although i find interviews a bit annoying, that one was quite enjoyable... maybe because my bandmates were more talkative than what i've expected or maybe because we felt a bit comfortable having joey as the one interviewing us... oh well, hope it turns out just fine and would be instrumental in making people understand us a little more... i also wish that some of my "legitimate" peers in the indie scene get a chance to be interviewed so as to give assertion to the claims that we (specially i) gave out...

MILLENIA GIG: we did a total of 15 songs that night! it was like practice (meaning, FUN). at first we were - especially me
a bit surprised to see people inside the venue... as usual, we did or own thing in offensively loud fashion. honestly i tend to feel more confident when someone from the sound system starts begging us to turn our guitars down. i also enjoyed seeing these two guys in front and someone from the middle bobbing their heads to our songs... i got to talk to one of them and he said that he came all the way from sta rosa laguna just to see us... i was so flattered... thanks sir! the next time we see each other i'll give youa copy of the cd. the only problem is that i don't remember what he looked like because i got too shy to look at him... that is how i react when praised - i get shy! by the way, nagkabudget kami kagabi. hehehe ayun diretso kainan agad. panalo talaga yung dinuguan!!! it was also there where i told them my plans regarding the EP... it's going to be released but in a low cost manner... hopelly by end of april or middle of may we'll be touring behind it!!!

yun lang... i'm depressed again!











Friday, April 04, 2003

Hold on! Baka malipat daw ang gig naming sa Mayric’s to another date because Parokya ni Edgar might take that slot. Tsaka may bago na pala: “Magsuot ka ng mao-onnnggg…” :D

If you’re reading this post, it must mean that blogger has fixed itself and that the world will be happy again. I really hate the fact that I’ve written so much already and it can’t even be published. Of course, Allan is probably thinking right now that I’m such a lazy bum for not updating again when I finally have all the time in the world. Well, for everyone’s information, I’m writing this at 4 pm, April 4.

Last night, Joey from PULP magazine interviewed us at the Seventy-seven café on Hemady St. I could hardly keep my mind on the interview because it was soooo hot and I felt so stuffy sitting there even if it was sort of open-air. The bad part was that somebody had turned on the ceiling fan above us—and we still weren’t feeling any air! I checked to see if the setting was too low. It turned out that no matter how close I got to the blades, I felt nothing. Probably the blades were put on the wrong way. It was frustrating to feel sweat flowing in rivulets down my back knowing that an almost fully functional ceiling fan was running right on top of us. Imagine how Ayn felt in her long, black dress!

Joey ordered us some beer while we waited for Allan to arrive. At first, it was only Roel who was talking to him… the rest of us were just keeping quiet, doing our own things. I guess we were nervous. He must have thought we were a bunch of snobs. Then Allan came and everyone visibly relaxed. As I said before, we were anxious about what we were going to be saying at that interview, and somehow the presence of wise, OLD Allan was reassuring.

Hmmm… how did it go? Well, I can only recall certain moments off the top of my head. Of course he asked what our idea of “indie” was. Allan gave this brief history lesson, which I’m sure even we appreciated. So Allan set it straight, but what the interviewer wanted to know was whether we would sometimes shy away from using the word “indie” when telling people what we play. I admitted that I did at first, because I knew people thought it had the same connotation as “alternative”. But then I realized that it really is a term for a certain type of music and that we should use it because that’s what we are. I told him that I thought people who scoffed at “indie” are as bad as the people who glory in it.

Basically, we just told him that we were just a bunch of friends in a band playing a certain kind of music. He asked us how we would explain our music to a layman. We quoted a line from Allan’s mock profile: “It’s like listening to The Carpenters on the deck of an aircraft carrier while watching fighter planes land and take-off all at the same time.” Basta… yun lang naman yun… we hang out and perform!

Some memorable parts:

· He asked us who were our worst critics and what the worst criticism we got was. Ayn answered right away, “Sinabi nilang tunog-Sandwich kami.” All of us were, “Si Ayn yung nagsabi niyan ha!” Natakot nga si Allan kasi sabi niya pala-away yung ibang sagot ni Ayn. Pero ok lang yun… sabi nga niya when asked how we react to critics, “We don’t care what they think at all.” To he first question, Allan replied that Purists tended to disown us, and it hurts since we’re from the same scene, but it’s ok. Ganun daw talaga eh.
· He commented that he and his colleagues were often wary of interviewing indie bands because these bands usually have a certain untouchable attitude. He asked us if this was an effort we were making to talk to him and make him feel comfortable with us. No! We’re really this weird and jolly when we’re together and with some people. And the fact that we’re a hodgepodge of people with different interests in music means that we really have to be open-minded. Shy lang talaga kami kaya hindi kami masyadong nakikihalubilo sa ibang banda. If you don’t approach us, we don’t approach you. Sabi ni Allan ayaw lang daw niya sa mga nagbabandwagon—nakakainsulto daw kasi sa mga taong sampung taon na nila ginagawa ang “indie”.
· Asked what mainstream favorites we have individually: I said Sarah Mclachlan, Radiohead, Third eye Blind; Ayn said Matilda, PM Dawn; Ralph said dati Slapshock tsaka Parokya; Allan said Moonstar and Hammilan; Roel said something I didn’t really know hehehe.

Basta… di naman kami maarte. Masaya lang kaming kumain at tumugtog! Sa Tuesday na pala yung pictorial for the write-up.

So we went to Millenia for our 1 hour set. Ok pala yung lugar… parang inca burial chamber hehehe. Naingayan sila samin sobra, pero ok lang… ganun talaga kami eh. After, nagtrip kaming mag picture-taking around the venue kasi ang weird ng architecture. Nakakatawa yung mga pose namin!

Hinatid muna naming si Charms pauwi and then we went to that Pares Place near Ralph’s for a cheap food trip. Ok nga dun eh. Ang linis tsaka masarap. I think we’ll be going there more often. We’ll probably move the movie marathon to Saturday or Sunday.

Hope this entry gets published! Oh yeah… if this entry reads weirdly, it’s because my space bar is busted and I’m typing this on Word (all “namin”s automatically become “naming” and I might have missed some.
sigh... when is this going to get fixed? hey allan! why don't YOU post?
yoohoo... test! ayaw lumabas ng past two entries ko eh...

Thursday, April 03, 2003

After watching a free German film at the UP Film Center (which actually turned out to be more Turkish than German), Ayn and Chris and I were notified by Allan that we were to practice last night. The next day (today) is for an interview with PULP magazine about the indie music scene and about ourselves. Plus, we are to head on to Millenia at Kamuning to have a one-hour set. So Ayn and I were talking last night about the PULP interview and what it was to entail. She was told that they may have a concept pictorial for us on Tuesday—what sort of concept would that be? I’ve seen PULP pictures… Would they make Ayn and me dress up as dominatrices and strip Allan, Roel and Ralph naked under our stiletto heeled boots? I don’t know… I know that not all PULP pictorials turn out that way, but hey… they probably like the notoriety.

Mostly, Ayn and I were concerned about the interview itself. What to say, what to say? Neither of us were aficionados of the indie scene… and that is what the interview is supposed to be all about, isn’t it? Of course, we didn’t want Allan to do all the talking—and he doesn’t want that either. He just told us that we should answer as honestly as possible… what we know about indie, however minute it is. Anyway, there will still be questions about the band itself, which we know very well, of course. I guess it’s just intimidating. I mean… it is rather exciting for us to be in print, but I somehow prefer the obscurity. And of course, I don’t want to say anything wrong.

Anyway, we had a good practice session last night. I was very relaxed for one, having a beer to warm my insides in that cold room and sitting down on the couch just enjoying… as usual, everyone else sounded fantastic, barring the occasional slip of the fingers. We just wanted to refresh our memories, especially since we’ll have to take from the early songs to fill up the one-hour set tonight.

Everyone was broke so we couldn’t go out to eat or do anything. We dropped Ralph off at home and took Allan to Loft Katipunan to meet someone for business. It was funky because we actually got a complimentary bucket of San Mig Light… so kahit walang pera tuloy ang ligaya. We lingered there a bit and talked. It was a pity that it was already too early in the morning to stay on ‘cause we had a couple of laughs (what with me and Roel and Ayn and Allan cooped up together, with special participation of beer and Chris). Anyway, we went home and promised to be on time for the interview tonight. We might also try for another movie marathon, if we’re not too tired.

Anyway, watch out for PULP magazine’s May issue… we might be there or somewhere. Actually, Allan says me and him got a little pic in this month’s issue for Metallurgica. Haha. Pati sa Summer Slam pic ganun ang suot ko. Yarks.

Kita tayo sa Millenia Kamuning tonight? Tsaka wag kalimutan ang 14th sa Mayric’s kasama ang Soapdish at Blue Ketchup.

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

Hello everyone! I sound pretty chipper today, don’t I? Yep. You’ve guessed it. I’ve finished my thesis and now I’m free to keep posting here once again. Woohoo!

Well, this is actually a little late. We played last Monday night at Mayric’s, opening for Moonstar 88 and Parokya ni Edgar. It was my birthday but I didn’t have a single cent to treat my poor bandmates. Sigh. Ayn kept hinting about stuff: “Selena, Starbucks tayo” or “Selena ang sarap sigurong magsisig ngayon”… kasama pa yung hirit ni Gilbert na “Happy birthday, Mister Kebab”. Shucks. I felt like a rat. It hurts to not have money. But I’m sure they understood.

We had a sucky set actually. Ralph’s cable kept giving out on him and I… well, I just didn’t feel like singing that night. To tell the truth, I was feeling very depressed, what with my financial situation and feeling old and not being able to march at my graduation ceremonies and other petty shit like that. I almost wrote a song about it *gasp!*… that was how fucked up I was that night (you can imagine how Allan feels all the time hehehe). While I was singing I felt like the audience could see through me, that they could sense I wasn’t really performing for them or making much of an effort, that I was tired. I guess it contributed to the suckiness. Charmaine said I was good and loud though. Well, at least I didn’t let the band down too much.

So we finished early and we hung out in front of Mayric’s for a while. Allan showed us this mock profile he made of the band and we kept laughing. It’s really funny. Maybe we can post it here sometime. Of course, ehem, I’ll have to proofread it a bit. Ayn suggested that we put it in the inlay for the album… something like a background that you can’t see if you don’t look very closely. Interesting idea… provided that the album actually gets produced.

Later that night, Ralph and Charmaine left because they were so sleepy and Ayn went with Michelle to meet some people (maybe a certain brother of someone’s boyfriend who we thought was cute at Metallurgica?). I decided to stay with Allan and Roel. I was really down and I didn’t want to go home. Si Chris kasi eh, bad trip. Anyway, Allan ordered some lovely chicharon bulaklak and beers for us. By the time Parokya was singing “Gising Na” and all those other slow songs, I was pleasantly buzzed and starting to cheer up. Allan invited Dindin and Buhawi to partake of our chicharon bulaklak when they came down to rest. He told them that it was my birthday and Buwi said, “Talaga? Happy birthday!” and shook my hand. Dindin did the same. Buwi suddenly said, “Pakiss naman” and I said sige so we kissed each other’s cheeks. I turned to Dindin and said, “Ikaw di mo pa ko kinikiss” and so he brought down his cheek to me but instead I kissed him. And I suddenly realized how funny it all was and he said, “Teka parang mali yun ah!” and we all cracked up around the table. That was really funky.

I know how this sounds so cliché but I really felt it at the time. A year or two ago, I would have been ecstatic for Buwi and Dindin to have kissed my cheek but now it’s just funny because we see them so often. So cliché when people start feeling that way, but I did. I suddenly realized how lucky I was to be in that position. Weird. And I guess that’s how sina Led and Bird of Kamikazee feel, too.

Anyway, that isn’t candy stuff anymore, but I just wanted to say that I really am thankful for candyaudioline because it’s absolutely great to be a member. We’re at that wonderful stage of popularity limbo, where you’re famous enough to be recognized for your musicianship but not enough to be bothered by screaming hordes of fans everyday. There’s no pressure to be in it, but you get all the perks. You have great friends and a great venue for catharsis.

Updates: we might have a semi-regular gig at Mayric’s on the 14th with Blue Ketchup and Soapdish. Buzz Nite is on the 12th although we won’t be playing there because Allan is somewhere else… still, it would be good of you guys to support the indie scene.

Speaking of Soapdish, Jeff had an interesting time that night with his beer. The Parokya sethad finished and only Buwi was left onstage. Roel was picking up stuff but he decided to jam with Buwi and they started playing jazz rhythms. For a while it was doing pretty good… Buwi sounded different and Roel sounded groovy. Then Jeff and another Soapdish guy climbed onstage and added guitars. It was so funny beause everyone was obviously happily drunk, bu they still sounded cool. Then Buwi started repeating himself and Roel couldn’t do anything except rap beats. Jeff had to surrender his guitar to the other guy, but he grabbed a mic and attempted to help Buwi out with the vocals. The problem was that everytime Jeff was about to sing, Buwi belt out once more and he would have to wait again. Finally Jeff was able to sing… he sang, “You don’t see me for so lo-onggg…” ala Francis Magalona circa “Gotta Let You Know”. So it suddenly turned into a full-fledged rap thing complete with “Yeah” and “1-2-3” and stuff like that. Wewere laughing so hard at our table. Gilbert would sing, “Bigyan mo ko ng talo-ong” and Allan would answer with a “Di bagay sayo’ng baro-ong”. Oh well.

Allan and I decided to eat at Mister Kebab after that. Sumabay kami kay Popo of Moonstar and Jeff and his bandmate would sidle up to our car at stoplights and taunt us. He was even waving his shoe out the window. Sigh, to be drunk like that again…