Ayos ah. Reminiscing mode tayo. I met Allan through IRC. Channel ng Ateneo. That was mid-2000. During the time when I just quit some mediocre UP band that thinks Smashing Pumpkins is the best band in the world. I was made to quit because some faggot by the name of Pog wanted to snatch my position. I gave in and quit. They sucked anyway. Out of frustration, I just auditioned for 2 all-girl riot gurl bands that time, Apian and Anemia. My peers who share the same type of music that I really like were very worried about me because I kept on joining bands that play something I don't really like. Truth is, I just wanted to be in a band. Thing is, they all happen to play something I don't like. I promised myself then that I will never join a band that won't fit me. What more indie?

Anyway going back to me and Allan. He posted, "WHO WANTS TO BE A VOCALIST FOR A BAND CALLED SOFT PILLOW KISSES." Ako naman, I saw what he posted by accident. I was just waiting for an old friend to enter the channel then I saw Allan's post. I know I've heard of SPK somewhere so I decided to trip on Allan because I was sure that their type of music was something that I will never like. So I macked him. I asked him what type of music they're playing. He said "indie". I answered, "Oh ok. Well I don't know shit about indie." Then I closed the window. Allan was persistent. He asked, "So what type of music are you into?" I replied, "something dark", thinking that he wouldn't know shit about what I'm really into anyway. Ang bilis mag reply ni Allan, "Ah goth." I was surprised that he knows what I'm talking about. I said yes, then closed the window again. Tapos ayan na naman sha, "How old are you?" Sagot ulit ako, "18." I was thinking then, "tangina to ah. Hindi ba niya pansin na hindi ako interesado?" Then on second thought naisip ko why won't I give it a shot. I've always wanted to sing for a band. I've tried it only once years ago for a band that covers Cranberries and Lisa Loeb (kakahiya no) so why not try it again? Eh si mokong humirit, "nga pala I also have another band. we're looking for a bassist." Since he mentioned the word bassist, dun agad napunta attention ko. I said, "Ako. bassist nalang!" So yun.

Allan and I talked over the phone first. He let me listen to Candy's first release "Paint Your Silver Smile." First reaction? "Yaak. Tang ina parang Fatal Posporos. Yak talaga." Then he mentioned something like, "Ayn sige, alis nako we still have a basketball game with guys from Greyhoundz and Parokya and Teeth." Inisip ko, "pucha bigtime tong gagong to ah."

Days after, we met up in UP. Sa tambayan ng org ko. He was with AJ. I was thinking na baka pogi sila (ganda ng boses ni Allan sa phone eh) at baka ma disappoint lang pag nakita ako. So I played hide and seek with them (sort of). Nagtago ako sa table when they arrived. Nung nakita ko na pangit pala sila, dun nako naging confident. Inisip ko rin, "ah wala wala lang yung banda nito." Allan gave me a tape for me to listen to. Pagtingin ko, naisip ko ulit, "Yak yellow yung cover. Ang baduy. At bat ganito mga title ng kanta. Yak talaga. Pero ayos ha, may pa tape-tape pa silang nalalaman."

I was already thinking that it was a big mistake that I decided to audition for them. See, it wasn't just Candy who thought na big mistake ang nangyari. Ako rin. Mutual yon.

To loosen all the tension, I invited them for drinks. Allan suggested that we go to 70's Bistro. I said, "ok. sige 70's." and I let them lead the way. Truth is, I haven't been to 70's Bistro that time! I let myself get drunk, mainly because I was so nervous about everything. About joining them and all. Not only because I thought they sounded stupid but also because I noticed that they were really serious about the band. That time, I also sensed the friction between me and AJ. I already knew that he didn't like me at all. Well, I didn't like him either but still decided to become friendly with him and ask him about stuff that he's into. Thing is, ako pala ang mali. He suddenly started talking about me behind my back. He thought I was tripping out on him but I wasn't! Naging grabe pa when I offered him a gum. Akala niya, I did that because I thought he had bad breath.

Anyway, fast forward to first practice. I sucked big time. They all thought that I'm already familiar with the songs because Allan gave me a tape. Truth is, I only listened to it once kasi di ko na kaya talaga pakinggan. I only liked "Flaming Walls" and "We've Been There" because they're catchy songs. Up to this day, yun parin ang gusto ko lang sa tape na yon. Main reason why I hate playing the old songs.

Si Allan, natiis ako. My first gig was at some University Gym somewhere in Manila. Na shock naman ako. Tang ina ang daming tao for a first gig. I did well that night but I sucked for the next gigs. My being a sucky bass player went on for more than a year. I was worse than Roel, would you believe. Pano ba naman, aside from not being familiar with the songs, I listen to Dead Can Dance, Therion and Diabolical Masquerade pag papunta sa gigs. Siempre pag tutugtog na, nakalimutan ko na songs ng Candy. ( I know I still do that nowadays pero minsan lang)

Sometime mid-2001.... It was during the night when Candy gave birth to "Better View" that I started playing better and Candy got what they really deserve from a bassist. The rest is history.