i posted this as a comment on dino's livejournal:
HI PEEPS, ako nga pala si allan montero tubong manila at taga CANDYAUDIOLINE, nag iisa palang sa buhay pero may kinakasama. tao lang. nag enjoy ako sa mga nabasa ko. at in a way, na hurt din. not only for my own self but also for my bandmates. i was able to read their entries (including blog ng candy, blog ni ayn, at lj ni dino) as dino suggested narin when we talked kahapon. wala naman akong makitang sobrang dapat ika baliktad ng mga underwear niyo. maliban lang sa pinost ni ayn regarding the "character choo choo". i talked with ayn about that and she had a valid reason naman. siguro sa inyo hindi pero wala na akong magagawa dun. sayang matalino pa naman kayo. pwera lang si jef. she posted something sa blog namin which i think very well states her side, na kung babasahin niyo ng may malinaw na isipan at gabay mula sa espiritu santo ay maliliwanagan kayo. amen.
ayoko na sanang mag-react kasi ayoko ng ganito, pero...
TO DINO: kala ko ba malinaw na yung usapan natin kahapon? hindi ako nakaluhod, nakahiga ako, kung ako yung tinutukoy mo dito ["it's like in the old ages and by old ages i mean that scene in braveheart (sorry i just watched it eh), when william wallace (gibson) came back to his village and was challenged to a duel by that BIG GUY. BIG GUY threw this big rock at william wallace but failed but when it was wallace's turn he just threw a small pebble and BIG GUY was on his knees."]
["9. Allan calls me up. Because I gave him my word I won't talk about the conversation in my journal."] ANO TONG MGA TO, dooD...
----[Your friends are way too eager. (Mine were driven to tears and had to make phone calls)]
----["gusto mo marinig yung reaction ng kabila? "ed di bumuo sila ng sariling nilang eksena!" ]
["di ko gets yun. pero ang gets nagmuka na silang tanga at alam ng lahat ng tao kung sino sila. di pa rin nila tanggap ang criticism"]------diba sinabi ko sayo kahapon na alam namin na mukha naman talagang tanga ang CANDYAUDIOLINE sa lahat. shoegaze metal ika nga diba. kahit kami nga tinitira namin sarili namin eh. i just want to make it a point na hindi naman namin inasam na mag mukang number one. we're just friends who happen to be in the same band. siguro mabigat lang talaga ang dugo ng mga tao samin. san ka ba naman makakakita ng indie-indiehang banda na may bokalistang iyakin pero maganda (yeehee i lab you), may isa pang miyembrong mukang hip hop pero mahilig manlibre ng mga tinuturing niyang friends at hatak narin ng mga tinuturing niyang friends, bahistang nagpapaka anonymous according to you guys (eh hindi naman lj user na may username) at naka black at mayaman, lima sasakyan at may magandang anak na balang araw ay magiging diva, gitaristang ang impluwensya ay gitarista ng suave band pero kamuka ang bahista ng gorillaz, drummer na pwedeng tumakbong presidente ng pilipinas dahil sobrang dami niyang prends pero tingin sa kanya ng mga friends niya pet sya.
["i love playing this flame war game. it's just a game. it doesn't really matter who wins or who loses, just pure unadulterated real time online entertainment."] --- i hope you really mean what you're saying.
TO JEF: hindi na kita paaabutin sa korte. ngayon alam na naming lahat ang ugali mo. di bale, pwede ka pa namang makikain at magpalibre at humingi ng pera sakin.
TO ZJ: bakit ano ang nagawa ko sayo? mas kampi pa naman ako sayo kesa kay.... kala ko ba friends tayo? bakit mo naman kami tinawag na insecurity guards? puede naman insecurity blankets or inSECURITY bank. kras pa naman kita nun. idol ka pa naman ni ayn. kaya nga sya nag bass eh. buti pa si mel nag hi sakin. ikaw may pa irap irap ka pa. buti hindi pinasok ng lamok yung ilong mo. joke. pasensya na at hindi ko alam na apektado pala kayo dun sa pagbabago ko ng line up. honestly, i was trying to be fair to all. alam ni dino yan. an in-explain ko kay aj yan. nung mga unang tugtog niyo naman, lagi ko pinagbibigyan si dino kung anong gusto niya. yun lang time na yon ipit din ako. di bale sana prends parin tayo. hindi ko rin kasi gusto ang narda. pero friend ko yung singer because she is a good. naalala ko nga nung kelts cross ka pa dati...
TO MELANIE: sorry din sa line up. tanong niyo nalang kay dino kung ano yung real reason.
["this cracked me up! yeah, i seem to remember there was only one band playing that night :)"] ----kailan? pati ba naman ikaw? aahhh, lubitels lang pala. playing to their friends. okay. klasik (pinoy tayo eh).
TO ARNI: ["the thing that i dont get is this.. let's say yung band nga na yun yung tinutukoy... kunwari yun nga yung sinasabihang pretentious kuno.. fine. why cant they take it then?'] ---please refer to deleted blog entry. didn't she say "you win some you lose some"? wasn't that acceptance of criticism that may or may not have been directed to us? kung di namin matanggap ang criticism dapat matagal na kaming nag disband.
["not every night will be good, but if you had fun playing then thats good enough. not everyone will like lubitels, not everyone will like their band, not everyone will like each others bands, but what the fuck right? di pa nakakalabas ng pilipinas mga banda dito nasasaktan na sa mga comment na ni hindi naman sa kanila directed. kaya walang growth sa music dito.. puro gusto naririnig kapurihan. nagbanda pa!... and im generalising OK!!! pasalamat at walang mga NME, Uncut at Q magazine dito.. or taina maski mga DiS at pitchfork kung saan tinitira mga tugtugan... ewan ko na lang. baka maHURT masyado mga tao.. pepersonalin pa siguro.."]----sana nga you're generalizing. and also hope that you could help by organizing other events kasi i know may experience ka dyan. diba sa milenya you have your own event?
alam mo ba kung bakit walang growth sa music dito? ako hindi ko alam. basta alam ko na i'm doing my best to look for fresh new bands lalo na yung may potential para lang tirahin nila jef and company.
--your "UNKA PESTE" at oo tama ka hindi nga "vengeance" pangalan ng anak ni ayn as you posted sa e-groups ng dating myx.
TO THE FRIENDS AND FANS OF THE LUBITELS: i also admire them naman (although i don't think that they take me as a friend anymore). i see them as one of the bright hopes for the scene kasi sobrang bihira ang may bagong banda na may sariling tunog agad. that's why i keep putting them up, asking dino kung kelan sila available.
TO THE PEOPLE CONCERNED: about my comment "bumuo na lang sila ng sarili nilang eksena", I really meant it when i said that to dino because there have been so many complaints about the way i've been handling buzz night. pasensya na, pero busy person talaga ako. although i really care for the scene, i think i can no longer satisfy the tastes and standards of its more discriminating members. it is more of surrendering na lang to people who think they can do better events that will cater to their tastes. I WILL STILL CONTINUE BUZZ NIGHT pa rin, but i won't promise it to be an all-out indie affair because, as i've said, halos wala nang bagong banda. everyone who wants to play at this event is welcome.
but then again, as someone said, "this night is not working for [you] anymore." since when?
sincerely yours,
allan
ps. maglalabas nga pala ang CANDYAUDIOLINE ng album. sure na to. sana suportahan niyo kahit gamitin niyo lang siyang salamin pag nagsusuklay kayo. ang title ng album ay "SAVED IT FOR TORTURE REFERENCE." oh diba goth?
sige na. GOTH-om na ako. di bale sa birthday ko imbitado kayo. i've said my piece. now i will rest in peace. sagutin niyo nato hanggang gusto niyo at sana ikamatay niyo kasi huli nato. dapat kahapon sana eh pero may hindi sumunod sa usapan na walang lalabas sa pinag usapan namin. diba nakaka degrade naman yung malamang may iyakin pala sa isang death metal band? sorry kung naka offend ako kaya lang naka offend din kayo.
["that buzz night dangerously lacks a lot of rock."]
----sana nandun kayo nung november at december...wala kasi kayo eh... pwera kay jef. rock on.
***
grabe ngayon ko lang uli nagawa 'to.
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